- making people forget about object permanence
- growing a wing. just one. fly around in circles
- summoning vaseline
- changing the colour of objects into their complimentary colour
- super speed but only when drunk
- instantly mastering the swear words in any language
no but bi harry deliberately fucking with ron like they’re at christmas dinner or w/e and harry just goes “you know ron i’m in love with your sister and everything but if bill was single…goddamn. i’d go there”
bill winks across the table at harry
"GODDAMN IT YOU CAN’T TAKE ALL MY SIBLINGS, HARRY."
"Don’t worry, Ron, you can keep Percy."
I FUKCGIN PISSED MYSELF
Woman yelling at her daughter: For God's sake, you are 23 and you DO NOT need a Pooh stuffed animal.
Daughter: I want it and I'm buying it.
Woman: This is ridiculous.
Me: If it makes you feel any better, I'm 19 and I just bought a doll for myself.
All the other CMs: Yeah, you're never too old for Disney.
And the random guy in line with an entire Vinylmation box: To be honest, these are for me.